Drumroll, please! The Gorilla announces his monthly Top Banana contest!
Every 30 days or so, the Gorilla Seed Bank will hold a contest to give an ace prize to one lucky monkey from our troop! Entering is simple – For now, just go to Facebook and like us! No purchase is required, but we might ask you something simple like “Why Do You Love The Gorilla?”
For our first contest ending 31 Aug 2012, The Gorilla is giving away a shiny, new Rokit Bong emblazoned with the Gorilla logo! Before this baby hits your door, protect your stash with a temporary BYOW policy ‘cause it’s so brill everyone’s gonna want to take it for a test drive!
What’s So Smashing About the Rok-It Bong?
In addition to its rockin’ good looks, Rok-It blasts off with these turbo-charged features:
- 14-port filtration system to break the gas into thousands of tiny bubbles for the coolest and smoothest experience of all time!
- Quickly dismantles for easy cleaning ‘cause The Gorilla hates dirty bong water more than rotten bananas!
- The Quad ring seal makes the Rok-It completely air-tight while the stainless-steel components never rust.
- The extra-wide base prevents any kind of accidental slippages or spills.
- The Gorilla logo makes your Rok-It a one-of-a-kind!
What are waiting for? Get over to Facebook and like us!
We hope you’re just as excited about our new site as we are and enjoy your time here! As you get to know the big man (we just call him The Gorilla), you’ll discover a whole new way to buy cannabis seeds in the UK. After sharing our own experiences in this market, we brainstormed as a group to come up with a ton of ways to make this kind of shopping experience fun for everyone. Here’s a short summary of what we came up with:
- Kick-Ass Customer Service – The Gorilla never leaves you hanging! One of our friendly gorillas will monitor your shipment from the time you place your order until you open the package and confirm you’re happy with the goods. Plus, you can contact us anytime you want if you need something right away!
- Only the Best Seeds – We’re a completely schwag-free site! All our seeds are sourced from the most reliable breeders and guaranteed to be fresh. Although we keep enough on hand to satisfy orders immediately, we don’t accumulate a stockpile that forces us to sell old, dusty seeds.
- Discreet Next Day Shipping – The Gorilla personally packs each shipment in a discreet jiffy pack with nothing on the outside to identify the contents. All orders in by 3 p.m. go out the same day using Royal Post Special Delivery with a tracking number. With next-day shipment on all orders, you’ll get your seeds the next day. You’ll never spend weeks waiting for your seeds to show up when The Gorilla is in charge!
- Swag Bags and Monthly Contests – The Gorilla loves giving away the good stuff! With each order, you’ll get free rolling papers, free sweets, free stickers and FREE PREMIUM CANNABIS SEEDS! That’s right! The Gorilla will give you up to 7 free, premium feminized seeds with every order. See our free seeds page for the current selection! And, watch our blog for our first contest announcement. Every month, The Gorilla will give away a prize that’s totally droolworthy! If you love to see your friends turn weed-green with envy, this is the contest you gots to win!
- Best Price Guarantee – When you deal with The Gorilla, you don’t risk a thing! If you find the same seed at a lower price on another site that sells in the UK within 30 days of placing your order, just let us know. The Gorilla will fork over the difference and change our website so the entire troop gets the best deal.
Can you tell we get a little excited about cannabis seeds? OK, we’ll be honest – we’re obsessed! Before the medication kicks in and The Gorilla comes to his senses, we’d like to tell you about our plans for the future. As you can see, we’re concentrating on treating our troop like kings of the jungle first and worrying about expansion later.
Right now, we’ve just went with our favourite flavours from the most reliable breeders, but we’ll be expanding soon. Expect to see more strains, more breeders and more free stuff as we get a little more experience under our belt! Hell, if we get all the legal stuff straight, we might even ship to our monkey cousins in other countries!
Oh yeah, one more thing. The Gorilla gobbles up feedback quicker than a ripe banana! Our goal is to make this the best cannabis seeds site ever, but we can’t do that without your help. If there’s anything you like, anything you hate or anything you can’t wait to see, let us know. We’ll do our best to make it happen!
Until Next Time,
Your Friendly Gorillas